“I am not the same having seen the moon shine on the other side of the world.”
-Mary Anne Radmacher
My worst fear about moving half way across the planet is losing someone I love and care a lot about. Your expat family is amazing at being there for you but, they just won't ever completely understand me and my family and where we are from. It's the same for my "home" family, they won't ever fully understand the things I am going through here. It's a double edged sword. I LOVE both aspects of my life tremendously. It's just when you are on the down hill slopes, it's a little scary the sheer loneliness that you can feel. I'm strong, but man... I didn't know I could feel like this. Like I said, I've learned a ton about myself this year. A ton. A really good friend to our family had been fighting cancer, and he passed away recently. It's incomprehensible, but what I know, and can put into what seems like logical thinking, is that he is no longer suffering and he truly lived life to it's fullest. It's a bitter/ sweet reminder that you just got to live life.
I feel like some of the things that I thought I knew for absolute certain, are completely in the air and floating around. Like, for example, I came here and quickly judged people on their limited rights, or what I would see as being limited. However, it's my view based on my experiences. This does not mean that this way of living life is wrong, it is just different than mine.
A quick summary of what one day looks like in Kuwait- text from last night style: "Quick and simple- all over the grid. I got sick again... Surprise surprise. I've never lost my voice before coming to the sand box. So, I wasn't prepared for teaching like I would normally be. A student came up to me today and told me that she is happy I am her teacher. Wow.. Those are the moments a teacher sincerely enjoys. Then, on my way home I heard and saw an accident." NBD.. (no big deal).
Choir: I appeared in my first opera production, Dido And Aeneas. Man, that was a busy week! I finally got to retire the toga, abiyah, witches nose, fake plastic bow and arrow, and sailors hat. Now, we have been starting to practice a musical that we will perform towards the end of the year. It's called Sing Me A Love Song. Our pianist (the director's wife) composed the musical. It's sort of like high school glee style about cliches and facebook. A direct quote from our last week's practice, "It's about time someone wrote a musical about facebook." I guess you just need to be in Kuwait for that!
Jazz: Inshallah. Good thing this living in a hotel thing has taught me patience. Woofda. (I. Want. A. Gig. Now.) ya heard me.. I said NOW! hahaha.. inshallah. God just must not "will" it to happen...
Lebanon: This trip definitely goes down in the books as one of the best trips I've ever had. I literally loved every single minute of it. We had great times with great friends and saw some pretty mind-blowing and fascinating things.
We stayed at a hotel called, "Diana's Tower." It was pretty nice, although my standards of "nice" have gone down throughout my life. I'm generally just happy to be warm and clean. I keep telling my friends that I'll take the bathtub if we don't have enough beds- I think they think I am joking but I am not! I have never slept in a tub before, and for some reason after a few drinks it seems like a pretty comfy place to be.
The first big thing we did in Lebanon was visit Jeita Grotto, that was argued that it should be one of the top ten "Wonders of the World." People compared it to seeing the Grand Canyon. It's a gigantic cave, and it's just really breath taking and cool. So, yeah, I suppose I can see the comparison to the Grand Canyon because it is pretty grand. There is a part of it where you can ride in gondolas and take a water tour of it. However, that part was closed when we went because it was "winter." The part we did see was pretty surreal.
It only took one day in Lebanon to completely pull my interest. Everything about it was fascinating. There were mosques literally right next door to cathedrals. What?? I found Lebanon to be the best of both worlds. I know Beirut isn't exactly on people's most want to travel to lists, but dang..! I sure am happy I got to experience it. We would spend one day by the beach in Byblos (one of the oldest cities in the world- the alphabet was founded there), and then the next day drive an hour into the mountains and go snowmobiling. I LOVED snowmobiling. The mountains were huge and the view was so incredible. It was probably my favorite part of the trip. We also found ourselves at a club that was Super Hero themed and decorated like a comic strip. I promise I am not making that up.
Since this trip was during Kuwait Liberation Days, we ended up waiting for a while to get a taxi home. Apparently it's a good thing we weren't here for the holiday. I hear people walk around outside all day and squirt waters guns at each other, and even inside your vehicle. (KEEP YOUR WINDOWS CLOSED) Just on the night when we got back, there was bumper to bumper traffic and horns/ fireworks/ crazy lights everywhere because NO ONE HAD TO WORK THE NEXT DAY! ugh.. I can personally vogue for how grumpy teachers get when they NEED sleep, and can't get it!
Some pictures from Lebanon:
Teaching: Oh yeah.. teaching. Hah, wow... it seems like I have just blinked my eyes and poof, here comes April ready or not! Teaching has gotten a lot easier. I have relaxed, and I feel comfortable with it now. Just remember- constant reflections as well as constant trial and error are signs of "good teaching." I keep telling myself that life next year is going to be monumentally easier next year. Which, maybe that's the cause of my feelings of uncertainty towards the changes of next year. Am I going to need to find my own trouble or mischief just to keep things interesting??
Spontaneous weekend trips to Bahrain: Good friends equals good times. It may have been a little too soon after Lebanon, as it took my body a full week to recover from both trips. We had an all day- all you can eat/ drink brunch! This was totally amazing. Plus, they had a real pig, as in pork to eat! We met a whole bunch of marines who were at the same brunch. They kept telling us that we are so brave for coming over here by ourselves. (double ego-boost.. and *thank you mr. marine people). I sure didn't mind chilling by the pool in our 5 star hotel the next day, while drinking a glass of wine and eating my cheese and bread platter. Or, my adult lunch-able. (as Rose would call it) Man... some of the places you end up/ see in life..
Embassy nights followed by singing our hearts out: A couple of us from choir went to the British Embassy (surprised?) to watch a group perform Julius Cesar. Of course, they made us wait until after the show to induldge on Embassy- real- drink goodness. Then, they cut us off early! So, what better thing to do than to go back to one of our apartments and sing at the top of our lungs while drinking post- real- embassy- drinks of red bull and sour cider for several hours? Man, we pulled up some good tunes. We also allowed a portion of our evening/ early morning for patriotic singing. Now, let's talk about mixed emotions. I gotta say though.. I really am proud to be an American.
Life in Kuwait: No apartment still, but there will be one for me next year so that is good news! :D Some friends and I were talking about how buildings are built here and how scary it is. I said, "Chyeaah, if we ever head an earthquake, we'd be screwed." Which, is actually really true. The response, "Yeah, all you could do is hope for a quick death."
-Mary Anne Radmacher
So... Who am I?
Sometimes, when I look in the mirror, I don't recognize myself. I feel like I am looking at someone else, and then realize that it's myself. This year has helped me learn a lot about myself to say the least. It may be something only an expat can relate to but, I really am proud of taking a gigantic leap of faith to come to a middle eastern country all on my own (as a first year teacher). It sure is good to know I am still following the expected phases of culture shock.My worst fear about moving half way across the planet is losing someone I love and care a lot about. Your expat family is amazing at being there for you but, they just won't ever completely understand me and my family and where we are from. It's the same for my "home" family, they won't ever fully understand the things I am going through here. It's a double edged sword. I LOVE both aspects of my life tremendously. It's just when you are on the down hill slopes, it's a little scary the sheer loneliness that you can feel. I'm strong, but man... I didn't know I could feel like this. Like I said, I've learned a ton about myself this year. A ton. A really good friend to our family had been fighting cancer, and he passed away recently. It's incomprehensible, but what I know, and can put into what seems like logical thinking, is that he is no longer suffering and he truly lived life to it's fullest. It's a bitter/ sweet reminder that you just got to live life.
I feel like some of the things that I thought I knew for absolute certain, are completely in the air and floating around. Like, for example, I came here and quickly judged people on their limited rights, or what I would see as being limited. However, it's my view based on my experiences. This does not mean that this way of living life is wrong, it is just different than mine.
A quick summary of what one day looks like in Kuwait- text from last night style: "Quick and simple- all over the grid. I got sick again... Surprise surprise. I've never lost my voice before coming to the sand box. So, I wasn't prepared for teaching like I would normally be. A student came up to me today and told me that she is happy I am her teacher. Wow.. Those are the moments a teacher sincerely enjoys. Then, on my way home I heard and saw an accident." NBD.. (no big deal).
Choir: I appeared in my first opera production, Dido And Aeneas. Man, that was a busy week! I finally got to retire the toga, abiyah, witches nose, fake plastic bow and arrow, and sailors hat. Now, we have been starting to practice a musical that we will perform towards the end of the year. It's called Sing Me A Love Song. Our pianist (the director's wife) composed the musical. It's sort of like high school glee style about cliches and facebook. A direct quote from our last week's practice, "It's about time someone wrote a musical about facebook." I guess you just need to be in Kuwait for that!
Jazz: Inshallah. Good thing this living in a hotel thing has taught me patience. Woofda. (I. Want. A. Gig. Now.) ya heard me.. I said NOW! hahaha.. inshallah. God just must not "will" it to happen...
Lebanon: This trip definitely goes down in the books as one of the best trips I've ever had. I literally loved every single minute of it. We had great times with great friends and saw some pretty mind-blowing and fascinating things.
We stayed at a hotel called, "Diana's Tower." It was pretty nice, although my standards of "nice" have gone down throughout my life. I'm generally just happy to be warm and clean. I keep telling my friends that I'll take the bathtub if we don't have enough beds- I think they think I am joking but I am not! I have never slept in a tub before, and for some reason after a few drinks it seems like a pretty comfy place to be.
The first big thing we did in Lebanon was visit Jeita Grotto, that was argued that it should be one of the top ten "Wonders of the World." People compared it to seeing the Grand Canyon. It's a gigantic cave, and it's just really breath taking and cool. So, yeah, I suppose I can see the comparison to the Grand Canyon because it is pretty grand. There is a part of it where you can ride in gondolas and take a water tour of it. However, that part was closed when we went because it was "winter." The part we did see was pretty surreal.
It only took one day in Lebanon to completely pull my interest. Everything about it was fascinating. There were mosques literally right next door to cathedrals. What?? I found Lebanon to be the best of both worlds. I know Beirut isn't exactly on people's most want to travel to lists, but dang..! I sure am happy I got to experience it. We would spend one day by the beach in Byblos (one of the oldest cities in the world- the alphabet was founded there), and then the next day drive an hour into the mountains and go snowmobiling. I LOVED snowmobiling. The mountains were huge and the view was so incredible. It was probably my favorite part of the trip. We also found ourselves at a club that was Super Hero themed and decorated like a comic strip. I promise I am not making that up.
Since this trip was during Kuwait Liberation Days, we ended up waiting for a while to get a taxi home. Apparently it's a good thing we weren't here for the holiday. I hear people walk around outside all day and squirt waters guns at each other, and even inside your vehicle. (KEEP YOUR WINDOWS CLOSED) Just on the night when we got back, there was bumper to bumper traffic and horns/ fireworks/ crazy lights everywhere because NO ONE HAD TO WORK THE NEXT DAY! ugh.. I can personally vogue for how grumpy teachers get when they NEED sleep, and can't get it!
Some pictures from Lebanon:
Teaching: Oh yeah.. teaching. Hah, wow... it seems like I have just blinked my eyes and poof, here comes April ready or not! Teaching has gotten a lot easier. I have relaxed, and I feel comfortable with it now. Just remember- constant reflections as well as constant trial and error are signs of "good teaching." I keep telling myself that life next year is going to be monumentally easier next year. Which, maybe that's the cause of my feelings of uncertainty towards the changes of next year. Am I going to need to find my own trouble or mischief just to keep things interesting??
Spontaneous weekend trips to Bahrain: Good friends equals good times. It may have been a little too soon after Lebanon, as it took my body a full week to recover from both trips. We had an all day- all you can eat/ drink brunch! This was totally amazing. Plus, they had a real pig, as in pork to eat! We met a whole bunch of marines who were at the same brunch. They kept telling us that we are so brave for coming over here by ourselves. (double ego-boost.. and *thank you mr. marine people). I sure didn't mind chilling by the pool in our 5 star hotel the next day, while drinking a glass of wine and eating my cheese and bread platter. Or, my adult lunch-able. (as Rose would call it) Man... some of the places you end up/ see in life..
Embassy nights followed by singing our hearts out: A couple of us from choir went to the British Embassy (surprised?) to watch a group perform Julius Cesar. Of course, they made us wait until after the show to induldge on Embassy- real- drink goodness. Then, they cut us off early! So, what better thing to do than to go back to one of our apartments and sing at the top of our lungs while drinking post- real- embassy- drinks of red bull and sour cider for several hours? Man, we pulled up some good tunes. We also allowed a portion of our evening/ early morning for patriotic singing. Now, let's talk about mixed emotions. I gotta say though.. I really am proud to be an American.
Life in Kuwait: No apartment still, but there will be one for me next year so that is good news! :D Some friends and I were talking about how buildings are built here and how scary it is. I said, "Chyeaah, if we ever head an earthquake, we'd be screwed." Which, is actually really true. The response, "Yeah, all you could do is hope for a quick death."
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| View out my window on Liberation Days.. bumper to bumper traffic. |
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| 1:30 or so AM dust storm! |
